Frustration… And a glimmer in the distance.

Feeling unproductive over the last few days. Of course this is not particularly true, I have in fact been accomplishing a fair amount. The real trouble has been that my days are abbreviated due to rehearsals running late into the night. I am normally a morning person. Getting home from rehearsal at 11 and later has meant that I don’t get to sleep until much later still. After an active and creative pursuit I require some time to spool back down. My proclivity for the morning hours means that my mind is at its most productive and creative between 9-11am. I once encountered a scheme for tracking this using colored pencils to shade a chart of your emotional and creative reactions to different periods of the day (I highly recommend taking the time to plot your day according to these cycles). After doing this (and accidentally noticing my tendency to interrupt the rote tasks I had while working in a golf shop building clubs to jot down images and lines of poetry at this time of day) I worked to use these times of day for those things which I was most passionate about and determined to improve. Unfortunately though, my first week of the year has thus far been a bit slow. Late nights mean late mornings and no chance to take advantage of my most energized hours. And as we all know, momentum is key when it comes to this sort of thing. This seems a bit of a digression, perhaps due to my writing at 1:30 in the afternoon. In order to jump start my focus I’ve picked up and moved to a favorite pleasantly-dark and remarkably-quaint local cafe… At least I’ve started writing.
New paragraph, bucking the digression. The play I’ve been working on is a lovely, funny, sweet play with a fair degree of nuance. But the process and the production overall have been a massive disappointment. I came to this company after seeing the makeup of some interesting, and sometimes ambitious past seasons. They also have been operating for 50 or 60-odd years. But when the rehearsal period began it quickly became clear that there was to be little organization and even less professional decorum. Worse yet, each time I decided to grant the benefit of the doubt, I was proven foolish. Many theatres operate with bare bones staff and little budget, these things are excusable. But total absence of and even occaisional contempt for artistic process or exploration crosses a line of excusability. There is however a growing upshot!

There is a major project I intend to undertake. An idea which has been kicking around for some time. Something hatched between myself and one of my fellow CNU alumni who has been a confidant, an object of envy, of off-brand desire, of massive inspiration, and a recipient of my warmest affection, suffice to say she is my most important creative ally. Our project will be outlined here in this blog as it begins to take shape (indeed it is much of the reason I’ve decided to create the blog). The upshot of my current experience is that it is pushing me to define new parts of the vision for our creation. It is giving me a deeper impression of the potential of what we will do. Yes, clearly I’m mincing words and keeping things gossamer, hazy, amorphous and undefined. I am waiting for more plans to be laid before making anything public. But the way it looks now this could be a defining experiment of my artistic life for some time. And needless to say, you will get to read about it here.